“Would you settle for a tulip?”
This film begins with James Bond on a Sterling Archer-like rampage. “Where’s Blofeld!?”
The rampage is a continuation from the last film, On Her Majesty’s Secret Service. I don’t like to give away the endings with specific details in these reviews of the Bond Film Franchise. But I also don’t recommend you watch On Her Majesty’s Secret Service, so here comes the ending. Get ready or stop reading. Blofeld kills Bond’s new wife moments after the wedding. The film ends really sad. Very disappointing for a Bond film.
Sean Connery returns to exact revenge for his dead wife. The opening is fast paced and intense, and fairly violent, too. Bond is mad. We haven’t seen him like this yet. I think he kills Blofeld during the rampage, but I’m not sure.
The opening credits roll and Shirely Bassey returns to sing the title song. It’s nearly impossible to top her Goldfinger hit and this one doesn’t put up much of a challenge, but it’s a good song. The repetitive lyrics become hypnotic. “Diamonds are forever, forever, forever…”
There’s trouble in the diamond market. Bond is briefed by M and a diamond expert. Someone is smuggling diamonds, but those diamonds aren’t making it to the black market. Someone must therefore be stockpiling them. A mas release could cause prices to plunge or blackmail. So Bond is off to Holland to jump on the trail of smuggled diamonds.
Moneypenny appears in the field in this one. She asks Bond for a ring, with a diamond, which implies marriage. That’s a little insensitive considering the film began on a revenge rampage over Bond’s dead wife. Bond plays it cool and asks, “Would you settle for a tulip?”
Jill St. John sets the screen on fire as Tiffany Case. She’s in the diamond smuggling business and thinks Bond is her contact, at first. Then a tangled journey from Holland to Los Angeles to an early and vacant Las Vegas.
Las Vegas looks so different in 1971 than it does today. There’s a pan out that shows vacant lots which are casinos, hotels, and popular attractions today. What a transformation for that city. Bond plays a little in the casino where he meets Plenty O’Toole. She’s plenty nice.
There are two assassins in this film, Mr. Kidd and Mr. Wint. They keep killing people, but the audience doesn’t really know who they work for or what their deal is. They play it creepy.
Q cheats at slots using one of his new inventions. He goes down the line hitting jackpot after jackpot, but there’s no indication that he plans to collect his winnings. Even when Q cheats his integrity keeps him honorable.
Jimmy Dean plays a Howard Hughes like character named Willard Whyte. And wait a minute. Did I see Blofeld again? I thought he was dead. Charles Gray gives a great portrayal of the mastermind villain.
Felix is played by a real short guy this time. He certainly looks up to his older colleague. And Bond certainly looks a little older in this one. Connery wasn’t in the last Bond film, George Lazenby played our hero, and he was young and thin. Connery is neither in this one. He’s added a few years and a few pounds. He still looks the part, but we know it can’t last. A younger man will be next, we can already tell.
Bond finds the bad guys’ lair, but be warned, it’s really dumb how he finds it. They could’ve done a better job on that silly plot twist. “Baja? I don’t have anything in Baja.”
The ending action scene involves Jill St John in a purple bikini. SPECTRE has a space laser. It needs to be stopped or something. She wears the bikini in the whole scene, it’s well made. The scene that it is.
The film ends with one more scene, one more attempt on Bond’s life, which is something we haven’t seen since From Russia with Love. Here, Mr. Kidd and Mr. Wint, who the audience now knows are SPECTRE hitmen, but Bond doesn’t, reappear as waiters with room service for Bond and Jill St John. Bond’s sense of smell and sophisticated pallet are too much for the two assassins to maintain their disguises. A short fight and Bond and Jill St John are left romantically together. Nice ending to a solid Bond film.
Never say Sean Connery won’t return as Bond, but he doesn’t, at least in any Eon produced Bond films. A new actor takes over as James Bond in the next film, Live and Let Die.